Keaton's Batman Returns

Listen to me: Let's go back and show them what we're capable of. We have to end it on our own terms - with a grand gesture. Flames. Sacrifice. Icarus. You hear me? You can do it. You are...Batman!!

It's been a week since this rumor began, so it's safe to offer my take on it. I'm in favor of it, because I think it's indicative of a new wave of films coming our way featuring all the familiar characters...it's not clear if it will happen, but I can picture what they might have in mind...and it looks like it could be a lot of fun.

Michael Keaton is "in talks" to reprise his role as Batman and co-star alongside Ezra Miller in The Flash. This would not be a new take on the character - Keaton would be literally playing an older version of Batman in the 1989 Batman film directed by Tim Burton, albeit with the manic edge that sets his Batman apart from other portrayals. The plot of this new movie would be that the Flash accidentally enters an alternate universe after traveling back in time to prevent the death of his mother by Professor Zoom, the Reverse-Flash. The Flash ends up in an alternate reality where he temporarily retains his old memories but has no powers and the nearest superhero in existence that he recognizes is Batman...only to discover that this Batman is not the Batman he knows.

This plot was inspired by the DC Comics mini-series Flashpoint, which was adapted into an animated, direct-to-video film and was the launch pad for the New52 line-wide relaunch/reboot of all the DC Comic books almost a decade ago. When fans on social media learned that Christina Hodson's screenplay was going to be based on this film, they didn't expect how loosely it would be adapted. In the original storyline, the Batman whom Barry Allen (The Flash) encounters is not Bruce Wayne, but Thomas Wayne, Bruce's father. In this alternate world, Bruce is killed by a petty thief with a gun, while his mother Martha is also shot, but survives, only to go insane and become The Joker of that universe. Fans assumed these characters were going to be reprised by Jeffrey Dean Morgan and Lauren Cohan, who had previously appeared (briefly) as Thomas & Martha Wayne in Batman Vs. Superman: Dawn of Justice. I admit this would've been interesting, but what's being cooked up sounds much more enticing...or, in the words of Birdman:

A billion (dollars) worldwide, guaranteed!

The inspiration for having an older version of Batman is based on 2 very popular takes on the character in comics and on television: Frank Miller's The Dark Knight Returns and Batman Beyond. Both depicted an aged Bruce Wayne, floating between 60 and 80, attempting to continue his crusade against crime either through updated gadgets & costumes or grooming a replacement. The role Keaton would play is that of Batman as a mentor figure, a Merlin/Obi-Wan Kenobi passing along everything he's learned, while still having a part to play in the battlefield. It has the potential to be a very lucrative role for Keaton, currently 68, yet looking a lot more fit than Iain Glen, who played a different version of an older Bruce Wayne in Season 2 of the DC Universe streaming series Titans, is eight years younger than Keaton, yet looks older than Keaton..

   I mean no disrespect, but...yeah.

Hodson's script for The Flash could still be following the bare bones outline of the plot, but I am going to speculate that the story will be getting more of it's energy from a subsequent story that teamed Batman & The Flash - The Button, a simple mystery story, created as a set up for Doomsday Clock, but the film may not need follow that..unless they might want to set that up, but there's no hint of that. The point is, it's Batman & The Flash teaming up to stop Professor Zoom from destroying the universe with time travel paradoxes. It's not clear if fellow superhero Cyborg is still involved in the plot, but he could be handy with a lot of the technological plot contrivances. 

At heart, it's clear that the film is going to be about the Flash learning that Zoom killed Barry's mother and framed his father with the crime, creating the impetus for Barry to travel back in time to try changing this outcome and accidentally enter a parallel universe, which is revealed to be the universe of the 2 Batman films directed by Tim Burton, albeit 31 years later. He meets the older Batman of that world, who helps him get his powers back (perhaps with help from Cyborg?), then helps Barry stop Zoom from using the paradoxical gateways to destroy the whole multiverse. When Barry returns to his proper timeline...it could end either way. The original comic ended with him in a newly-readjusted reality, so you'll see Keaton's Batman show up and say, "Glad you made it back, Barry", or they might want to end it with the updated Burtonverse established in case Ben Affleck might want to come back and do that version of The Batman that he had planned to do a few years ago...

The conceit of establishing the existence of a multiverse in the DC Films allows for every project in play to matter and be included. When the CW network adaptation of Crisis On Infinite Earths, featuring all the characters from live-action TV series with the DC Comics superheroes available aired this past winter, nobody anticipated that would be a test run for something more ambitious with the films. Warner Brothers' new owners, AT&T, is the main straw stirring this drink that's being concocted, but it depends a lot on specific things happening to work. For starters, Zack Snyder's Justice League has to be the success that people are beginning to believe it will be. Second, the "talks" with Keaton have to be a success. It could involve him recieving "points on the back end" of The Flash and 2 other projects that are also linked to the discussion - Batgirl and Batman Beyond.

A few months back, I had fun speculating on what the plot of Christina Hodson's top secret Batgirl screenplay could be about, but it was based on the idea that Batman might not appear in it. If the deal succeeds, Keaton's Batman will appear in this. Some fans speculated that this meant we were getting Batgirl Beyond, but it could be 2 different things.. it did remind me that Batman & Batgirl teamed-up once in the comics to fight Dr. Phosphorus - the visual inspiration for Batman Beyond's Season 1 villain Blight:

And...I'm still rooting for Lily Collins to be cast as Batgirl/Barbara Gordon...in this case, I can see her playing off Michael Keaton really well.

It's alleged that if Batgirl is the whip cream on this milkshake, Batman Beyond is going to be the cherry on top - first alleged to be a series on HBOMax, but now alleged that AT&T wants it to be a movie. This is the one where Bruce Wayne is a mentor to Terry McGuiness, a teenager who is later revealed to be his son in Justice League Unlimited via DNA rewriting courtesy of government agent Amanda Waller.

This milkshake was given sprinkles with an additional rumor that executives at AT&T want Johnny Depp in this movie as The Joker. Effectively, this Batman Beyond movie would be taking cues from the most famous (and popular) story of that series - Return of The Joker:

Where am I getting these rumors from? The same place everyone else gathers rumors from - YouTube. I had first read the rumor about Keaton from Twitter, with the link to the article from The Hollywood Reporter, but the speculation about the plot of The Flash is my own. The Batman Beyond rumors, including the desire from AT&T to get Depp as The Joker - comes from the Midnight's Edge YouTube channel. All of these sources stress that these plans depend upon a deal with Keaton, who is suddenly getting the most attention he's ever had since the last time he played Batman onscreen. This will be fun to keeps tabs on to see what develops.

You're a movie star, man! You're a global force! Don't you get it? We'll make a comeback. They're waiting for something huge. Well, give it to them. Shave off that pathetic goatee. Get some surgery! 60 is the new 30, motherf---er! You're the original. You paved the way for these other clowns. Give the people what they want. A billion worldwide, guaranteed!..this is where you belong.

In The Spirit For An Xmas Wedding

I had to jump out of the passenger side of Nick's car and land feet first in front of the courthouse steps as it hovered near a fire hydrant.

"Thanks for the lift. Central isn't exactly across the street from the carrier."

He laughed and gave me a thumbs up. "No problem. I'm sure Eb would've gotten you here even quicker - Duggan tells me that cab has booster rockets! And tell Colt the job is still open if he wants it!" He shut the door and took off as I rushed in.

***

The Groom was staring into a mirror in the Commissioner's office, adjusting his mask. I knocked on the door. He saw me through the mirror's reflection.

"The door's open!"

"Hi Denny. You're not wearing your black suit?"

"I don't wear a black suit."

"Right, right. So anyway, I'm glad I made it here in time to be the best man and all, filling in for Eb and such. Where's Sam and Blub?"

His mask secure, he began readjusting his tie. He must have been nervous. "Sam's on a new case with Tracy's kid, Junior - and he talked Eb into coming along...a trio of investigators...sheesh. And Blub is with the Curry's in Alaska, fighting winter zombies. By the way, Eb left his cab behind to serve as our chariot - you'll have to drive it, so that's three jobs I've got for you."

"Three?"

"Yeah - Dolan's doing the ceremony after we caught Mr. Carrion posing as Judge Kitchen. You'll need to give away the bride."

"Busy day?"

He smiled. "Eh..it's looking up. It looked like the bride would be late, but it turned out she found where we left the gown on her own and sent the message to Dolan through one of the bailiffs." Finished, he took one last look at himself. "..and something blue."

***

I couldn't see the bride under the heavy veil, but the gown was beautiful. It also had a very long train that I almost tripped over when I walked around from behind to take her hand.

The organist began to play the wedding march. As we slowly walked up the room, I took stock of how they decorated the area with loads of Christmas and Wedding-themed decor: pink bouquets, a white cake, a Christmas tree, a table full of gifts (I'm glad I remembered to bring something, although most of the gift boxes were the same size as what I had brought with me - a dreadful thought popped into my head)... Dolan stood at the center, with Denny to his left. I wonder what Dolan was going to say? Or did the Bride and Groom have vows prepared?

There were even two of Santa's helpers - though they looked kind of seedy: the first one was acting as an usher and didn't even fill out his suit; the second was slumped in a chair at a far corner with his gloved hands wrapped around a bottle of rot gut on his lap. He was out for the day.

I also took notice of the crowds in attendance: Family, friends and acquaintances of the Dolan family appeared on the Bride's side...the Groom's side was made up entirely of cops and crooks - the crooks in handcuffs, of course. Among that lot I recognized Satin, Wang, Boil, Cossack, Hussein, Lox, Carrion, Paris, Julia, Sand, P'Gell ... I think someones missing..

And then I almost tripped again! "I've got you," the Bride whispered. She did have a very good grip.

"Yeah, thanks," I whispered back.

And then she kept on whispering. She was talking to herself. "I've got you this time, Gainsborough, in front of everyone, now. There'll be no more cat-and-mouse games from here on."

Her grip was getting tighter, that's when I looked at her hand and notice the gloves she was wearing. They were purple with stripes on the back...purple, purple, purple...

***

It turned out this was going to be a very short ceremony. Neither side had anything to say and Dolan seemed keener on re-lighting his pipe.

"I left my matchbook in my desk, so if the Groom wouldn't mind putting the ring on her and getting on with it, so I can consider you kids married already.."

"Sure, sure, of course." Denny nervously nodded. His hands were shaking fierce as he reached into the inside pocket of his jacket ... and then became eerily clam as he smiled while he revealed a pair of handcuffs and slapped them on the wrists of his bride!

"Sorry, dear, but I'm afraid I've got cold feet to go with your cold hands." He lifted the veil. The face was familiar: white and blue complexion, with matching blue hair and makeup. Actually, there are three or four nasty women fitting that description, so I waited for Denny to say it. This event was cooling up.

"Louise Lincoln, it's been a pleasure." He reached inside his jacket again. "I believe you were looking for these?" He held up a set of gold wedding bands that revealed inscriptions that glowed and became legible when held up to the light. "The Tibetan Yeti Bands - believed to grant unknown power to the bearer of the ring, if I recall the legend correctly. I just thought they'd make good bait when I had this event advertised in the papers."

"What did she do to Ellen?" I asked.

Dolan laughed. "Who? Seriously, this event was advertised as the wedding of Thomas Gainsborough, here. There was no mention of the bride's name."

The purple gloves on Louise's hand began to change. First they began turning into a paler shade, then they formed a heavy coat of frost before crystallizing and shattering, exposing Lousie's free hands. Her handcuffs become useless when she froze them, breaking them off as well. She then froze Denny, Dolan and myself  and grabbed the bands off Denny's palm with ease. All we could do was watch.

"Just because the wedding's off doesn't mean the bride is obligated to give back the rings, Gainsborough! Watch this bride run away!" She turned and began to make her exit. All the crooks seated in the groom's aisle were cheering her, but didn't dare cross her path.

That's when Santa stepped in. "Where's your Christmas spirit? Is that why you're so blue?" He then grabbed the train of her gown and began to spin like a top, forming a tornado that reeled her in. She began using her powers to fight back, but the end result backfired.

Santa took off his suit and revealed another red suit, one with a familiar lightning bolt symbol stamped across his chest.

"Just when I thought I was going to have to pull one of my old tricks and dash for a present, Louise shows up to help me make a gift: an ice sculpture!"

He raced forward and used his powers to thaw out the three of us - generating heat by offering the ultimate pat-down. It would've been very awkward if it lasted longer than 2.5 seconds.

Denny thanked him by admiring his handiwork with Louise - currently serving as a wedding gown tornado preserved in her own ice. "What a pity we'll have to arrest this one and put it in the fridge right away. You do good work, Wally."

"Thanks. I love spending the holidays back home in Central. By the way, those gloves she was wearing..."

I jumped in. "I can answer that one. Those gloves are a big deal this year. I brought a set for you as a gag. And I noticed that drunk Santa wore a pair as well."

Denny's eyes widened. "Santa?" He turned to the corner. There was only an empty chair where the fat man once sat.

Denny looked a bit forlorn. "I missed him...Santa was here...and I missed him."

Wally tried to cheer him up. "Y'know, it might not be who you think it is...I mean, Bats' wore purple gloves, too."


The End