I Made 'Comic Shop News'!

Comic Shop News is a free weekly newsletter offered at most comic book stores, highlighting news about current or forthcoming comics offered. As a bonus, each new installment reprints a week's worth of installments of the ongoing Amazing Spider-Man newspaper comic strip, written by Stan Lee, drawn by his brother Larry, with Alex Saviuk drawing on weekends. It's the only place that still features Spidey married to Mary Jane Watson...for now, anyway.

Around late-December/early-January of every year, CSN presents The Red "K" Awards, named after Superman's rarely seen foil, red kryptonite, the awards offer a recap of the best and worst, the highs and lows, the cheers and jeers of things that happened in comics within the last year. And best of all, CSN concludes their Red "K" Awards by turning it over to the readers and letting us write-in our own Red K's, the best of which are printed and featured in a forthcoming issue of CSN.

And so...MY Red K got printed in Comic Shop News last week!!

"The Cooke-d Books Award"

I checked the email I had sent to mention the other write-in suggestions I came up with :

The "Finders Fee" Award
For Batman '66: The Lost Episode.

- I thought the price for this special issue was too high, considering that the bulk of it (the introduction of Two-Face, based on an unproduced script by Harlen Ellison, adapted for the comic book by Len Wein and Jose Luis Garcia-Lopez) was about the same length as an average issue of Batman '66..and I can still recall the days when a "prestige format" one-shot was around $5.95/$6.99, not $9.99.

The "Spider-Sense Fatigue" Award
For Marvel Comics' Spider-Man: Spiderverse crossover.

- For what is essentially a romp, I found this Spider-Man "event" to be kind of leaden..not bad, but perhaps symbolic of Marvel's boredom with Spider-Man/Peter Parker...once upon a time, Marvel Comics had one character named Spider-Man, Peter Parker with no other "Spider-..." counterpart to speak of, and that was all they needed for the first 10-15 years or so...or maybe this is a reflection of their frustration with the unanimous negative reaction to most of the Spider-Man comics published since "One More Day"?...

One out of Three. Not bad. I'll try again next time.

What? Not Impressed?

DC Comics is "..living the interesting times" lately - where can they not go wrong? Type "DC Comics controversy" on Google and see what you get.

It seems they got their Forever Evil event going, but with an old trick from the 1990s: the gimmick cover. What's being described as a "3D cover" is what I alwys identified as a "Wiggle card", but upon close inspection, is a combination of wiggle and 3D; the image does not wiggle, but it has the depth of field promised by 3D, and the image is clear and viewable without kitschy glasses.

The big controversy surrounding this event is that gimmick may have been added late in the game and there are more "standard" editions on stands then copies with the 3D covers. Retailers are hoping that people will buy the regular copies anyway to check out the stories because they're otherwise stuck with unsold comics that will eventually end up in the half-dollar box, particularly if it features a character that's unpopular.

Anyway...when I went to the comic shop, I only saw two comics with 3D covers available: The Riddler & The Creeper. The Riddler story was tied-in to a Batman arc that I haven't been following (I wait for the library to carry trades of a lot of the recent superhero storylines; I'm waiting for them to carry Before Watchmen as well, and Batman: Death of The Family - NOT "A Death In The Family", in case you were wondering). As for Creeper ... the cover looks fantastic, but the book is offering a new take on the character...a character who...well, most creators have had a hard time figuring out who or what The Creeper is; his appearance on Batman: The animated Series was a rare lucky break. The new take by Ann Nocenti & Chriss Cross (not Christopher "sailin'" Cross, in case you were wondering) seems inspired by legends/folklore from Japan about demons - Oni (not Oni the comics publisher, in case you were wondering). It's okay, but I wonder if the original Steve Ditko design has been given the boot, or if this was just some new mythology Nocenti was setting up. I did notice that the cover was a faint nod to the Creeper's first appearance in DC Showcase.

I flipped through the  standard issues offered...none of the stories really caught my attention, although the event is not finished yet - there's supposedly a revival of the Duela Dent "Joker's Daughter" character coming up (also by Ann Nocenti)..and I'm sure the 3D covers WILL turn up - marked-up, of course. It's really saying a lot that this event is the one bright spot in a rather schizzy summer for the company.

Oppan "Free Comic Book Day 2013" Style

I did the "walking tour" again through NYC this year for Free Comic Book Day - the promotion that entices people who usually never visit a comic book store to visit comic shops and get free books (maybe).

With each year, I find that my interests lie less in the free swag and more in sales and discounts (20%? Wow! That's sort of like a dollar off!...40%? Well, that's a little bitty bit better, I guess), especially from shops that have begun a dance (I remember the days when Midtown Comics used to have all the FCBD offerings available - this year, just 3) or decided to stop offering any free stuff (Forbidden Planet used to offer a hodge-podge/grab bag of miscellany, but they didn't have any this year, which, coincidentally, marks the 1st year at their new location a few doors down). I didn't bother with St. Mark's Comics this year - that store is like the old friend who you start to miss after a long break, then regret running into at the supermarket. i didn't check out the new Jim Hanley's Universe, either, because the line would have kept me from checking out Manhattan Comics, formerly known as Cosmic Comics - under new management (maybe). Hanley's is the only shop I know that manages to stay equidistant to the past site of each location it moved from (first it was at A&S Plaza - now shrunken into the Manhattan Mall, then it moved out an behind it on 32nd, then it lasted over a decade at 33rd & 5th - near the Empire State Building, and now it is on 32nd, between Park and Madison. phew!). Neither shop allowed a chance to pick up all the items offered, but at Manhattan Comics, it was o.k. to browse. Here are my findings:

- a lot of parents kept asking about the free Sesame Street comic, but when I flipped through the issue, I saw that it was just a partial reprint of the 1st issue. If you want something badly...

- DC's Superman comic was odd. It was a reprint of the 1st issue of Richard Donner and Geoff Jones' arc from several years ago. That's a little too far back to ballyhoo, isn't it? I suppose the real highlight was an interview with Scott Snyder about Superman Unchained, but where are the preview pages for that?

- the best offering? World of Archie Digest. That's right - nearly 100 pages of comics featuring a recognizable old stalwart...for free!! Now, that's the way to do it! Bravo, Mr. Andrews, Bravo.

- the biggest disappointment? No Disney comics. I had gotten used to seeing a FCBD offering featuring the Disney stock company (Mickey, Donald, Scrooge McDuck) since this event began, particularly when Gemstone was printing Disney comic books. last year, Fantagraphics offered a "Donald Duck Family" oneshot to promote their current hardcover "facsimile" (there's no better word for it - they're reprinted in the style of the ancient DELL Comics they appeared in, four-color process and all) reprints of Carl Barks stories - a new addition, "Donald Duck in 'The Old Castle's Secret'" is out this month. But this time - nothing. And despite the acquisition of Marvel Comics, Disney seems to taking a "long-distance relationship" approach to their ownership of the house that Stan's cousin built.

-Fun Surprise? Some shops tend to thrown in free comics that were leftovers/holdover/stuff rotting in the inventory. That's why you'll sometimes see Halloween-themed comics from the previous year. I picked-up a "Batman Adventures" comic (Not the "Beware The Batman" comic, which was just a preview). "Batman Adventures" reprinted two short stories written by current Spider-Man scribe Dan Slott back in 2002 for issues #1 and #4 of an interesting take on the "Animated Series" TV tie-in comics DC publishes. Warner Brothers Television Animation was no longer producing new episodes of "Batman: The Animated Series" and was in the middle of  "Justice League", so this comic featured tales that coincided with the assumed timeline/continuity that the cartoons were following, which meant that Batman now wore that long-eared "Justice League" costume in his own book. Both of the tales featured in this reprint are very good. Dan could easily follow Scott Snyder on "Batman" and should.

- biggest rip-off? the Smurfs. Only six pages of the blue guys. That's smurfed-up. Or  a clear case of "Bait-and-smurf". Ouch!

The Nifty 9 of 2012

It's time for a list of the Nifty 9 - reading material you can find in a better-than-o.k. comic shop that premiered this year:

(In no particular order...)

1.  Jim Henson's Tale of Sand:   I found out about this book after it won the Will Eisner Award for Best Original Graphic Novel. This GN, an adaptation of an unproduced screenplay written by Henson and Jerry Juhl, is a psychedelic romp through Monument Valley in which an average everyman tries to match wits with his better-prepared, urbane doppelganger while on a quest to "follow the map", have a cigarette, win the woman of his dreams, dodge the mad sheik's army, stay out of the director's shot, be the town hero and cross the dessert while heeding the warning:  "don't trust the map."

2. Transformers: More Than Meets The Eye #1: the quick-changing robots get the Justice League International treatment, beginning with this issue. Those of you only familiar with these characters (yes, characters) via the Michael Bay films will experience shell shock.

3. Case Closed - Volume #42: this manga series about a teen detective who turns into a kid detective and has to slowly solve the mystery of the clandestine organization behind his transformation, has been going strong for over 15 years, even if any hope for futher episodes of the anime spin-off being brought over to the USA seems unlikely. Anyway, this is the one - the volume I would recommend to someone who would be curious to try it. It's got some strong arcs and characterization, along with appearances and revelations from the semi-recurring characters that tend to pop in and out.

4. Doctor Who - Shada: this was the best read of the summer. Gareth Roberts had to rise to the challenge of cobbling together every draft, fragment and scribble of Douglas Adams aborted Doctor Who epic and reshape it into a proper full-length novel. Well, he did it. He really, really did it. My only question is: What will you do for an encore, Gareth? ... it just so happens that Tom Baker had written a script for a DW film that would have featured Vincent Price as the villain - titled Doctor Who Meets Scratchman, the film was almost put into production before the financing fell apart. When I had asked him on Twitter about it, Roberts reply was, "Good Idea." ...

5. The Secret History of D.B. Cooper: Oni published this series that offered a fanciful look into the life of that mysterious skyjacker whose fate has never been solved. The artwork is very Mike Mignola/Darwyn Cooke-ish, right down to the red gummi bear sidekick.

6. Idolized #0: From Michael Turner's Aspen MLT. The special premiere #0 issue of this comic starts off well. It's about the winner of a reality show in which super-powered wannabes compete for a rookie spot in an established team, The Powered Protectors, but there are hints that the protagonist is going to be their bad penny. BTW, this series is also notable for being the only comic book series I can remember that offered variant photo covers (in which they get a model to pose in costume as the lead character) that weren't bikini pin-ups in disguise. Vampirella, Glory, Ally Kat, The 10th Muse - all cheesecake.

7. Transformers: More Than Meets The Eye, #5: this standout issue is the conclusion to a medical mystery (yes, robots solving medical mysteries!) featuring fan-favorite Ratchet, is very entertaining, with an ending that's a laugh riot. There's a good reason the title of this chapter is not revealed until the last page...spoilers. ;)

8. Burt Ward, Boy Wonder:  the problem with small press companies is that you never know if the premiere issue is the only issue, or in this case, a sneak peek offered on Free Comic Book Day. This was supposed to be a spin-off of a popular series of their hit Misadventures of Adam West series, in which Sir Adam West gets involved in different kinds of adventures in different genres (usually nods to gigs-that-might-have-been, like playing James Bond in On Her Majesty's Secret Service or a Western film without the Three Stooges or a serious Caped Crusader and even appearing as Indiana Jones or The Mad Hatter). Here, Ward gets his own turn. First we get an update of his life right now - running a non-profit animal rescue shelter and walking two amiable pooches around the location of the batcave from the 60s Batman TV series. Then we see him chase a mysterious masked man (looking suspiciously like The Red Hood) into said cave,with the dogs tagging along. Just as John Carter wound-up whisked into Mars,  Ward and  the dogs wind up on another planet. It sounded like a fun adventure - we'll have to wait and see if and when it resumes. An ad featuring a spin-off series about Julie Newmar was also solicited, but has not appeared on stands yet.

9. League of Extraordinary Gentlemen - Century, Part 3: 2009: And this is the one to recommend to everyone - be it the folks who are curious try it or the ones who found past installments inaccessible, and not just because they'll get the references to 30 Rock, Burn Notice, Lost, Heroes, 24, Centurions, Emma Peel, Mary Poppins, Harry Potter, Children in Need, The Dark is Rising and Wizards of Waverly Place - this is the best comic book of the year. 'Nuff said. 'Nuff said.

So there you have it - a Nifty 9 bon-bons from 2012. I'll see you in 2013. :)

Grey Friday (Slightly Imperfect - May Contain Lead)

You won't find any comic book fans/collectors/hoarders camped outside their favorite/loathsome/middling/mediocre/so-so neighborhood comic shop on Black Friday. If you do see any, feel free to let me know, because it's an unheard of new development.

Some shops might offer a discount on Friday - emphasis on the word some. That's a shame, since I am convinced they would like nothing more than than to actually see stuff move. There are holiday sales, but not  obvious sales. No President's Day sale, but a Memorial Day sale. No Fourth of July sale, but a Veterans Day sale. No 24 Days 'til Xmas sale, but a ChrismaHanuKwanzaRamukah sale during that week leading up to New Year's  Day. No Back-To-School sale (because comics fit nicely in-between the pages of textbooks) but there might be a sale for Back-To-Comicon...(don't-forget-we're-still-here) in neighborhoods within close proximity to any events.

There was a time when I got my hopes up and thought change was in the air. Not Obama-style Change, but a chance for comics to be sold in a new venue - 99 cent stores. It turned out to be just one big fever dream.

The U.S. Government is enforcing tighter regulations banning the sale of any products containing lead. Lead - the manufacturer's friend, used in anything from electronic devices, herbal supplements, dinnerware, paint and, most important, children's toys and printed media. Could it be that all those old toys and books sold in comic shops were going to have to be rid of at bargain prices? Well...no, because technically, that's all grey market merchandise now. Grey Market merchandise consists of items that are sold anywhere but here, because they don't meet government quality control standards, yet they can be sold here in mom-and-pop discount stores, though not necessarily bargain prices. You can buy screwdrivers with handles apparently made of papier mache, wire and cables that do not fit in any of your electronic devices without a bit of give and take, toilet seats made from cardboard or shower curtains as durable as tissue paper.

Ever buy tubes of Colgate toothpaste with Chinese characters stamped all over? How about off-brand wet wipes/shampoo/detergent with Spider-Man on the packaging? It's all stuff you wouldn't find in your local CVS or Walgreens, but they've got it, along with brands of food you've never heard of, or discontinued candy (Fruitzee Rolls, anyone?). How about Flomo stationary? A Yogi Bear coloring book from 2010?
A High School Musical pencil case? Foam stickers of Spongebob Bluepants? Half-finished coffee mugs with Disney characters missing spots of color? A Hannah Montana sticker set, featuring badly scanned photos of a barely recognizable Miley Cyrus? How about some weird Winnie the Pooh robot toys? A large robot toy with the head shaped like the Ben10 character? Cars crayons? How about a CD case featuring Conan Edogawa and Harley Hartwell from Case Closed, but in pink, because the sweatshop that put the thing together had no clue that this was not a show aimed exclusively at girls, let alone young children. There's no such thing as flawed merchandise, so why not flawed comics? Never mind the high content of lead - how about comics from failed companies? Virgin Comics (Richard Branson and Gotham Chopra's attempt at launching comics as potential movie franchises), Crossgen Comics (Mark Alessi's love note to Roger Zelazaney, purchased by Disney before they decided to go for the real deal and stop being cheap), Topps Comics (The Kirbyverse, Jurassic Park, Duckman, X-Files) and Dark Hors - oops! Um..heh, sorry.

What about back issues? That's a tough one, but I would love to buy a copy of Todd McFarlane's Spider-Man #1 for a dollar - wait, I can actually do that now if I wanted... Actually, if this was 1982, there would still be 88cent stores (with tax, all items added up to 99cents). Most of the clothing in these shops come with a sticker tag that cautions that the item is "Slightly Imperfect" - just like most back issues! It's so easy!

What about direct market "exclusive" toys? The kind of toys that actually look dull out of the box, so we leave them in? That's a tricky one...how about behind the counter? That's usually where the cashier keeps the batteries and off-brand DVD-R/+R/pi-R/(x+y=2x)R discs...and the deodorant. 

There we are ... a socially acceptable venue ripe for exploitation!...and while I keep dreaming, I'll see if the comic shop is offering another 15% off sale. I hope they're not charging tax again...

A Lost "Last"/ Last "Lost" Tale...

I'm posting this link to one of the blogs I follow:

The Stuff That Dreams Are Made Of...: The Witches: The Real Deal.: BEWARE! SPOILER ALERT! The scariest film I ever watched as a child was Nicolas Roeg's The Witches (1990). There were many scenes in films...

I had commented that "The Witches" was one of the last projects Jim Henson worked on before he died, but in truth, it was one of the last he oversaw. Henson was a very, very, very busy man for most of his adult life. In some alternate reality, he's the guy on Ed Sullivan's show who spins dozens of dinner plates. There are a lot of things that never saw the light of day and exist only on paper in file cabinets. For example, "Tale of Sand", a screenplay for a feature-length film which he co-wrote with Jerry Juhl.  It was adapted into a graphic novel with art by Ramon Perez and won an Eisner award. It is not the last screenplay that he worked on, but it was "lost" for a while.

We do love discovering lost things, don't we? We all thought "Oh, The Places You'll Go!" was Dr. Suess's last book, but then his wife found "Daisy-Head Mayzie", "My Many Colored Days" and "Hooray For Diffendorfer Day!". We thought "Go Slowly, Sands of Time" would be the last Disney Duck tale written by Carl Barks, but then came "Hang Gliders Be Hanged", "Horsing Around With History" and "Somewhere to Nowhere". We thought "Curtain"  was the final Hercule Poirot novel, but then Charles Osborne adapted the play "Black Coffee". We thought "Shoscombe Old Place" was the last Sherlock Holmes story written by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, but then came "The Final Adventures of Sherlock Holmes", which collected all the apocryphal material we never thought existed. We thought "Salmon of Doubt" was all the material Douglas Adams had left behind, until Gareth Roberts adapted "Doctor Who: SHADA" into a full-length novel that is required reading for anyone curious about Doctor Who now.There's always something "lost" - never "last", or "One of the last", or something to be rediscovered...


In the 60's Jim Henson directed, wrote and starred in a short live-action film , "Timepiece", which was nominated for an Academy Award for Best Live-Action Short. The film is a series of jump-cuts to different sequences, all featuring Jim: Jim as a caveman running in the streets, Jim as a housepainter painting an elephant pink, Jim in a top hat and tuxedo jumping off a high diving board and into a pool, Jim as an escaped prisoner in stripes on the run, etc.. Then there's "The Cube" an hour-long drama that aired on NBC around the same time as Timepiece. "The Cube" is "Portal" without the portals - a man is stuck inside this white cell while others enter and exit freely, even interacting with him briefly. Both films have the potential to be pretty dark, but Jim seems to be enjoying it, so we're enjoying these meta-parables along with him.

"Tale of Sand" is "Timepiece" and "The Cube" for the widescreen. "a surrealistic comedy-drama", the introductory note describes, with most of the screentime set in the Southwest - the same battleground where Chuck Jones imagined those private battles between Wile E. Coyote and the Road Runner. There's very little dialogue. The protagonist of "Sand" is Mack, an everyman who walks into a densely populated western town with the diverse townsfolk celebrating his arrival. He is drafted by it's kindly Sheriff into a quest: it is not clear what that quest is. He is given a map and a rucksack full of supplies, is instructed to follow the map, but don't trust it, then sent on his way.

Throughout the journey, Mack is pursued/bedeviled by "Patch", a tall, dark, suave, well-dressed, wealthy and better-prepared antagonist, who is always handy with a bribe and almost-always accompanied by a mysterious blonde vixen. Strange things happen: signs pop up, wild animals pop up, buildings that are smaller on the outside/bigger on the inside turn up. Mack meets more enemies than friends and his quest devolves into a chase. Toward the end, the tale unravels and we start to get answers...maybe.

Had "Tale of Sand" been filmed, it probably would have been filmed earnestly at a quarter of the budget it demands, yet come off as a camp psychaedelic experience to anyone who saw it - it would have been "a groovy trip" spaghetti western. As a graphic novel, we get a chance to taste the images more and look for the meaning of what's happening - that is, if you would like it to have a meaning. It's not casual spending and I'm lucky the library had a copy, otherwise I wouldn't have been able to read it (it's not in any comic shops I've been to). It's worth a look.

Why Moore Serious?

Commitment is something I like to see in a comic book fan...actually, that's what the publisher would like to see. And the shops. 

If you have $120.00 saved for this summer, then that means you're planning to buy all 35 issues of Before Watchmen. Does it really matter that Moore had nothing to do with this one? We're all used to reading comics featuring characters written and drawn by writers and artists who are not the original creators. The same goes for cartoons, too. It's argued that Tex Avery and Bob McKimson created Bugs Bunny (the definitive version of the cartoon rabbit that had been floating in Warner Brothers cartoons under the same name) and they've been dead for decades. Should we have stopped reading Batman comics after Bill Finger got fired? Should we have quit reading Spawn when Todd MacFarlane stopped writing and drawing every issue? If we did take that hard line,we'd only accomplish saving money to buy other stuff. Why be Moore serious?

We have a way out - we don't need to feel like we're getting caught, we don't need to wear that long overcoat with the collar turned-up. When the sales numbers come in - actually, they're already in - they'll just show copies ordered by the stores. We're not in the middle, the shops are! We're just reading what we like! If we don't like Watchmen, we wouldn't be reading it, would we? We wouldn't pick Before Watchmen up thinking it will turn gold, now, right? Besides, this is no different from when soap operas would dust off old characters. When All My Children brought Angie and Jessie back from limbo in 2008, nobody complained much, even though it's audience had to be aware that this was an obvious sign none of the characters created in the two decades since those two left were clicking. Did it work? All My Children has been cancelled and has stayed that way since last year.

It won't work. Not because Alan Moore has gone on the record in interviews saying that this is a sign of total creative bankruptcy, or that the "talent" involved is not talented, otherwise they could have done something original and not a prequel to someone Else's story. Watchmen is all about telling a story. I did not get a hankering for a sequel about the Minutemen, because Alan had deconstructed them too well to offer anything more. Ditto the rest of the characters - what's Nite-Owl like in his prime? Ted Kord (Blue Beetle)? Daredevil? Batman? Is Dr. Manhattan more interesting than the Silver Surfer or Captain Atom? How about Rorschach and The Question? Or Silk Spectre and Nightshade or Black Canary or Huntress or The Wasp? It might be interesting to see what an Ozymandias comic would be like, but we've already seen what Alan Moore could do with him... This comic was all about a particular story and it accomplished more than it was meant to already. And I didn't care to read it a second time.

But that's not why it won't be a hit. Look at the teams involved. Two of the books involve artists not known for being fast. Two of the books are written by an egomaniac/windbag. Two of the books are written by someone who is better at one job than another. Two of the books are written by a journeyman. It's a very motley crew. If anyone's saving money on this, it's because only the first issues will have arrived on time.
We're in the middle, aren't we? No, I'd argue we're in the space between the middle. We're interdimensional. The whole thing could be a hit or a bomb and because these are planned well in advance, there's another event planned in the horizon that will get our attention. How did we get here? The past is a different country, they did things differently there... And when mistakes are made, they're in the past. The present is always a new country. And I don't miss All My Children or One Life To Live. Will we miss superhero comics?

Pinketty, Panketty, Poof!

It's not unusual to find issues of Wizard: The Comics Magazine in the half-dollar/dollar bins. On two occasions I've found issues that were still in their original bag - the first "special"/annual and an issue from 1998, which was opened, but still had a free chromium trading card that it offered - a picture of She-Hulk and Fairchild (Gen13)drawn by Jason Pearson.

Last week, some collector let go of his/her collection and the bulk of it was tossed into the half-dollar boxes at this particular store in NYC ("No names?" Yes, no names) and there were a bunch of Wizards from the magazine's heyday in the 1990's. The magazine had been around since 1992. The title is a holdover (or hangover) from the original concept: a mascot named Poof the Wizard, who would appear on the cover of every issue. When Gareb Shamus, the magazine's founder, learned that his cronies had suggested that name to have a laugh (Poof is slang for homosexual in the U.K. and Australia), the little cartoon wizard lost his chance at the spotlight, but the title of the magazine and 1st issue cover and copy had already been set and "proofed"! The solution? For the first few years, the cover of Wizard would show a comic book character holding a purple flag or cloth with white stars on it. Anyone picking up a copy expecting fantasy role-playing game tips was no doubt confused.

I recall Warren Ellis once remarked in his old column at Comic Book Resources (a website I am not affiliated with, though we have the same initials and I do lurk around on their message board as Joenosleep) that if you're on the Internet, you don't need to read Wizard. If you do, that means you're picking it up for the price guide. I would like to argue that there was a time when this was not so - between 1998-2001, Wizard was actually witty and informative. This might have to do with the fact that the "collector's bubble" had burst - huge print runs of comics published in the early 90's became worthless clutter as the publishers either blew deadlines or churned out bad comics. There were a lot of comics published by wannabes, could-have-beens and neverweres - all "Buy Me! This book is Hot!" and Wizard and Comic Buyers Guide and Hero Illustrated were the cheerleaders, rallying for these losers. Hot comics were hot not because the stories were good, but because they anticipated an event, or came bagged with a free trading card or had a shiny cover and the demand for this junk was considered hot. Ren and Stimpy #1 came bagged with an "Air Fouler" (air freshener-get it?) of either Ren or Stimpy - instead of packing both, you had to buy two copies - and guess what? Ren was harder to find! People cared about that!

And then it was over. The little guys weren't making money - just filling up their homes. Comic Shops went out of business - except for the worst ones, where the boss owns the building and can afford to run the store as he pleases, or shops that changed their name and appear to be "under new management", until you spot the old owner in the back of the shop.Wizard was last man standing when the bubble went "poof".

Anyway, I picked up Wizard #80, from 1998. The cover had the Hulk fighting Wolverine (one of the silliest recurring brawls in comics - the equivalent of watching a chess match with just two Kings standing on the board). The cover story was a countdown of the nastiest brawlers in superhero comics. Some of the pages had been torn from this section, so I assumed Wolverine was #1, while Azrael, Orion, Hulk made appearances. Azrael...the thinking man's Ghost Rider. Or Spawn. Or Death Scooter...

Oh, and once upon a time... Kevin Smith was cool! That's right! Before he became too fat to fly in a passenger jet, he was just the guy who made "Clerks", "Mallrats", "Chasing Amy" and the soon-to-be-released "Dogma", of which all anyone remembers is that it had Salma Hayek doing a pole dance (she did that a lot in her early movies - hmm, maybe Freida would've won her Oscar gold if it had a pole dance on museum scaffold). He had gotten attention for writing a rejected script for what eventually became Superman Returns, a film which became a cautionary tale in Hollywood for what happens when too many executives become too many cooks. The interview featured in this mag seemed to portray him as being on the rebound, hinting at his upcoming work relaunching the Daredevil comic book with Joe Quesada and Jimmy Palmiotti (Who knew this assignment was going to change the next decade of superhero comics? It seems so long ago..) and his work on Green Arrow (which landed with a thud, but it brought Oliver Queen back from old fart heaven, so go figure), and most interesting, but maddeningly - I wish this was something he had done - a film based on The Question.  When asked which characters he would like to direct a film about, he suggested this character and mentioned Dennis O'Neil's comic book series, that Hub City was like Sin City - fascinating. Can you imagine adding the Huntress to that mix? I hope the years of donuts and cannibus haven't wiped this idea out of his brain, because it's very good. He also gives Batman Forever a good poke in the ribs - "..that scene where he's like "I quit, Alfred. Batman no more. I'm like, 'Are you high?' Batman's desire for justice would never allow him to do this." And he plugs his N.J. comic book store - this was actually an ordinary shop; the Jay and Silent Bob's Secret Stash shop came almost a year later.

There were features I liked and missed when they were taken away - "Report Card"/"The Skinny", "We Read It For You", "Good Reading", "Thumbing Off", "Famous Firsts" and, in time for April Fool's Day - "Bad Readin'", "Famous Worsts" "Top 10 Comics" - all dedicated to reviewing comics and letting us know if any of this stuff was good.

When did this renaissance end? Around the same time the X-Men and Spider-Man films began production. Joe Quesada and Bill Jemas were running Marvel and using a lot of gimmicks to plant their feet. DC had Jeph Loeb and Joe Kelly boasting about their Superman comics, Bob Schreck was running the Batman comics with big stunts, like "Bruce Wayne: Murderer". J. Michael Strazincski was writing the adventures of a character that he wanted us to believe was Spider-Man - anyone who disagreed needed to "...get out of their parents basements." Joss Wheddon was getting his pop culture crown fitted. Grant Morrison slipped on the pop culture banana peel and achieved his own nirvana. Alan Moore became a wizard himself. Neil Gaiman and Todd MacFarlane butted heads over old comics. Leggo my ego, it was time to throw down.

And then there was ... boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom ... a giant monolith appeared from out of the sky ... BENDIS! Seriously, on his message board, Brian Michael Bendis would sign his posts like that. Oh, but he was cool at that time, too. Now he just looks like Kristin Davis' hubby on Sex and The City

So, if you perchance see any dusty issues of Wizard lying in a half-dollar bin somewhere, from 1998-2000, please don't laugh - those are actually my cup of tea.

The Fever is Coming Back...

 Every fan gets it - certainly a true comic book fan. I'm not talking about those two-arm,two-leg, "I'll-just-buy-one-issue-or-two-and-that's-my-collection" phonies or the "Oh,-these-comics-are-not-in-good-condition.-The-price-is-good-and-the-books-are-hard-to-find,-but-I'll-pass" and "This-shop-is-just-too-out-of-my-way-for-me-to-come-in-every-week" or "This-shopkeeper-is-racist!-I'm-never-coming-back!" pretenders. Feh!

  Comic books are like potato chips or gummy bears - you can never have just one. There's a reason why a serving of gummies is 15 bears. On the other hand, you can eat just one bon-bon - especially if it's that bitter, gooey, dark chocolate/caramel hybrid that leaves a bad taste in your mouth. Have you ever seen anyone eat two of those back-to-back? Outrageous!

 Remember the days of "self-contained" stories? If not, you're young (and I didn't know young people bought comics - I just assumed you waited for your Mother to force Dad to get rid of his collection or wait for Gramps to kick the bucket. This is strictly an adult hobby - did you not see all the old people walking around the shop?). A self-contained comic was simply a story that was complete in one issue - you need not fear finding out if Batman succumbs to bumping off the Joker in part 2, because there was no part 2. Of course, nowadays we would buy part 2 to see if he does kill the clown, knowing that if he did, we'd be up to our armpits in ninja gangster stories - this will never happen...oh, wait, they do that anyway. Today, a self-contained issue is a "launching point" or a "key issue" for a new storyline - a point-of-entry for "new" readers who want to know where they can hop abroad the moving train. These issues tend to be a bit threadbare in plot and story - usually a thrown-together mash-up of stock activity (Batman taking down gang members, Captain America riding his motorcycle and throwing his shield, The X-Men having a picnic or playing baseball, Savage Dragon getting a recap of what went on before while he was out, Spider-Man chasing car thieves) and then two-three pages of set-up for a new storyline (never a story-just a storyline) where some sign of dread appears - maybe a character watching from the shadows or some poor fool getting killed. "Not the end...check next month's issue and read this Wednesday's Comics and Stories #508 for another angle and read Death Scooter #267 to see Wendell check out the action alone!"

 But wait a minute - if you're a lowest common denominator, hardcore comic book fan, you're not going to sit and wait for four weeks for the story to continue, you'll want to check out what happened last month and the month before that (in the case of Transformers comics, you'll be checking on the last two publishers that had the character license). That means you're at the mercy of the back issue aisle - a wretched hive of scum and villainy if there never was one. Here, you can expect to be charged a tax on used, dog-eared periodicals, or - even sneakier - a tax on last month's issue, which may not have been bagged or boarded, but left sitting next to the current issue on the stacks. Here, you can thumb through a stack of old books and wish for hand sanitizer after gazing at your fingertips caked with dirt. Here, you can stare at dead bugs trapped in Mylar. Here, you can sweat through your clothes like a pizza slice in a paper bag when you realize the shopkeeper shut off the air conditioner so that you'd run out of there. Ha! As if that will work!

 Wait a minute...those tricks do work. They do make anyone with half a brain turn around and say "Never again..." They do lose new customers and new readers who developed a genuine interest in comics but can only go as far as waiting for the next issue and ignore the recent past. Who can wait for next issue when it takes over a year for a storyline to resolve itself and the price of a new issue keeps going up beyond casual spending. The fever goes away...

 The fever never leaves the die hards, though, especially the ones with Debit and Credit in hand. Yes, yes, even in the days of Cap'n Credit Crunch and Fannie Big Mac/whatever, you'll still see people spend $30/$40 dollars a week on comics. These die-hards won't pause when the total rings up an additional 8.25/god knows what % sales tax that makes no sense (even less sense when the clerk explains that it's because "It's an old comic" - wtf ?).

 That is why a "jumping-on point" comic is not just a beginning - it's an ending. Yes, the first dose might even be "Free" (right, Free Comic Book Day?), but the next dose is always hardest to take. Once you've got the fever, the prescription is a trip out of the store, or a four-color cocktail of last month's, last year's, next month's, or tie-in issues. Down the hatch. Never say "when". Oh, and never think about whether the stuff is any good - generic comics are never a steal. Yes, some places do tax issues from the quarter/half-dollar bins.


Happy Wednesday.

The Endgame Will Be Televised

Turning trash into treasure is one thing...how about turning an opportunity into a racket?

Long ago in a previous post, I had mentioned buying the first issue of Spider-Woman (late 70's series) for two bucks at a church show. This was in 1998, almost a decade before Jessica Drew got her big comeback when Brain Michael Bendis became writer of The Avengers. Suddenly, the price of the first issue shot up in value (though not as high as her 1st appearance in an issue of Marvel Spotlight). I recall Midtown Comics in NYC was selling the first issue for $60.00 at one point. In other shops, it earned its place on the "Please ask an employee" wall - where the prices are as high as their place on the wall. I was happy to own a gold nugget, even happier to get an autograph from Carmine Infantino - although, depending on who you're talking to, this actually lowers the value of the book. But we're not talking about money, are we?

 Oh, yes I am. Two months ago, I saw a rerun of Pawn Queens, a reality show, set in a pawn shop run by Minda Grabiec, Nikki Ruehl, Tom Brunzelle and Greg Holloway. The episode I saw featured a woman who had a collection of Spider-Woman comics and brought in the 1st issue to see if they were interested in  buying it from her. Minda (who looks a bit like Elizabeth Montgomery from Bewitched) wanted the book because she thought it would be a great prop to display in the store. Tom seemed reluctant, arguing that the book's value depended a lot on if the character appeared in a hit movie, since she was created so that Marvel could own the name "Spider-Woman". Nikki (who wasn't there, I'm just sticking her in because she reminds me of Sarah Michelle Gellar...with big boobs ) was busy elsewhere. Tom - and this is the part that got my radar antenna going - offered the collector ten dollars for it.

What do you think happened? Did she refuse? Did she say that Megan Fox signed on to play the role? Did she dust-off an old issue of Wizard from within her handbag from Jessie's comeback year?

Nah, she took the ten. And returned to the store to offer the second, third and fourth issues of the book for undisclosed amounts (possibly less).

Maybe Spider-Woman is a bad example, since I'm seeing issues offered for as low as a buck-fifty in shops lately. How about Amazing Fantasy #15? Spider-Man's grand entrance. Or the first issue of The Hulk by Stan and Jack? That was featured in an episode of FOX'S Buried Treasure.

The show is hosted by Leigh and Leslie Keno - middle-aged twins who resemble a wizened Zack and Cody, they're regulars on PBS'  Antiques Roadshow recieved humanitarian awards form President George W. Bush. (...confidentially...you didn't hear it from me, but gossip on the flea market circuit is VERY interesting...They Have Every Yard And Rallying Even Crying Right Out Of Kitchen Sinks). Their show, Buried Treasure, aired this past summer.


Anyway, the episode I saw showcased a collector who had those two comic books and an original animation cel from the Fleischer Brothers Superman cartoons.  And of course, the drama was that he was engaged and his girlfriend thought this hobby was silly -  not silly enough to not see the money in what he owned, but silly enough to feign ignorance as to the value and sit through the drama of whether or not they were being lowballed by offers made and if they could do better. It turned out the copies he had were not perfect - the Amazing Fantasy issue had some writing on the cover, the Hulk comic had some folds and bends along the spine (awww...look how they got their handy magnifying glass - no wonder fans and collectors complain so much when they buy a new comic and the employee ringing it up handles it like a throw pillow), but the item that had them drooling was the Superman cel. I think he kept that and let the dealers faces stay red. He did let go of the Amazing Fantasy comic, but kept the Hulk.

I enjoy seeing these collector endgames play out on the telly - it would be neat if they did a reality show set in a comic shop, where we'll see the owner buy out a guy's collection at ten cents an issue and watch employees go through the revolving door. Hopefully it will be a shop where the boss owns the building - the shops that last longer than three years usually do. Unless he finds he can make more money setting up a Starbucks or a Family Dollar - and that's the cliffhanger for the season finale! ;)

Writing Checks Your @$$ Can Cash - New Year's Eve Special #1

I will not make a New Year's Eve resolution. That's like a morbidly-obese man swearing off gummy bears. Well, that's a start...

No, no, no, - I'll still be reading comics - which means the collection lives.

Has anyone ever seen a storage bin full of comics? It's like the elephant in the room walked out of the closet/garage/basement/attic/trunk/house (house? Yikes!) and snuggled into a bolt hole. In fact, these collections found in storage bins are more like bears than elephants - they found a cave to settle in for the winter - or at least swapped places with the Christmas stuff.

Two months ago I went to a storage bin that the owner stopped paying rent for (he resolved to forget about it). I found a "The Batman" action figure still in its packaging (more like a dust jacket than a display case) and a copy of All-Star Comics featuring the Justice Society with the Super Squad - Power Girl, Robin and The Star-Spangled Kid. It was a good comic, but it was mangled and it had been bagged with a pack of temporary tattoos - I sold it for five bucks. Eh. Seriously, they should do a revival of the Super Squad. The comic I read looked like DC's equivalent of Marvel's The Defenders, where you had alternating teams, but Power Girl's still around, so is Robin (well, Red Robin - the character, not the fast food chain), and Stargirl is Star-Spangled Kid's replacement...that could work...

Top 10 of 2011 - no rules, here, just comics that are/were available this year:

1. Doppelganger - Inspired by an old Dell comic, Tom Neely gives Popeye a little existential angst in this indie mini-comic. Is what he am all that he am and therefore, all that he is?

2. Savage Dragon #175 - Erik is firing on all cylinders, here. You could argue that this is a comeback after  an offkey decade.

3. Ducktales #1 - never mind the inside - what's outside is a surprise for a show that's been gone for over 20 years.

4,5,6,7 - Ducktales/Darkwing Duck: "Strange Currency" - The crossover and climax may remind you of Spider-Man: Maximum Carnage... or not. Worth a look, warts and all.

8. DC Retroactive: Justice League International Special - One more shot by Keith and J.M.. This one is better than the two "Formerly Known As/I Can't Believe It's Not" reunion mini-series.

9. Spider-Man: Spider-Island - What on Earth made this work? Dan Slott, that's who. Take a bow, Dan.

10. Batman Inc. #7 : This self-contained, Tony Hillerman-esque remake of "Batman: Indian Chief" stands out from Morrison's concept-heavy material of late. And it all made sense on the first read!


Oh, why not?...My resolution is to continue and keep writing. Stick around. Happy New Year, Everyone.

A Comic Book Rehab Carol - Part 6

"Change..."

 A draft made the window blind slam the window with such a clatter, I had awakened  to see what was the matter. I had slept on the couch, fully-clothed and with cap, as if I had not taken a long winters nap.

I opened the window and shouted out into the streets, "What day is this?"

An old woman walking her toy dog replied, "huh?"

Never mind, I thought, returning to my couch. I found the remote, turned on the tv, searched the program guide, and what did I see?

December 23.

I had not missed it! Well, actually, I missed the 21st, which was the day the new books arrived at the comic shop, but that means I had not missed the 28th! There was time! Time to check for holiday sales and new comics, if any! And I will be looking forward to it this time! For this time, I know the spirits will have a surprise in store for me...

You see, that night I spent was not a mere fool's errand - I had made the universe of comics and the comic book marketplace a BETTER place. The spirits took stock of the error in their ways and change would trickle down from within.

And then they will come back. Not today right away, but in the days, months and years ahead, a new joy will be found in the now-happy medium, one built on solid entertainment, honesty, and care.

And Big Boobs, of course.

And as I joined the grinning old man wearing enormous sunglasses in riding with him in his Ferrari to enjoy the fine Burbank sunset that day, we shouted,

"Merry Christmas to all! Excelsior everyone!"


THE END 

A Comic Book Rehab Carol - Part 2

I heard a light tapping on my window. I saw a gloved hand creeping along the side of it, then a full figure slowly emerge as it leaned sideways, asking me to let him in. He was wearing a bright blue suit, with a matching fedora and a domino mask over his face.

I opened the window and he climbed in.

"Thank you," he said, and removed his hat to wipe the sweat off his bald head."I never feel too old for climbing. Anyway, The Man left your address on this matchbook  I scooped up."

"You're the Christmas spirit of the past?"

"Yeah, - The Christmas Spirit. How are you?"

"I'm fine. You look familiar. Have I seen you in the movies?"

He leaned forward. "You didn't see me in any movie."

"Fine. Where are we going?"

He walked to the window that had the fire escape. "Fire escapes are not my style. I prefer using my hands and feet and grabbing a hold to get where I'm going, but not when I'm a guest. We're going down - back to where it all started."

We climbed out the window and onto the fire escape, where the spirit led the way down to the ladder leading to the street. Just when it looked like we were about to climb off it, the spirit stopped me.

"Right here. This is the right spot to look in on the action."

What used to be a laundromat on the ground level had now become a store with a sign that read USED BOOKS. In that short walk I had been transported to another time and place.

I looked in on the action. a few people were lined at the register buying some old hardcovers and paperbacks. At a far corner, I could see two teenagers digging through some long boxes.

"This is the germ of the idea for the comic book store. Old copies of comic books were sold in used bookstores. This activity did not go unnoticed, as publishers were interested in new venues beyond newsstands."

"Wow! Tell me more."

"No. Less is more. Now follow me. Take this."

He instructed me to tie rope around my waist using carabiner rings as he did to his waist. We hopped off the fire escape and climbed the wall of the building two stories and stopped as comfortably as you could imagine on a window ledge. He pointed at a wide window. We were again transported to another place.

"Look. In twenty years time, comic shops are everywhere. This is the back room of one store. It's crammed with overstock."

"What happened? Nobody's buying comics?"

"They are - but not enough to match the number of copies being printed. The supply has outweighed the demand, and this store is about to be closed. Some of the stores facing this problem will survive, but only because their owners own the building."

"This is silly - you would think they would know not to buy too much of an item that's not in demand."

"Remember - comics were seen as an investment. Their ambitions and hasty decision-making was no different from yours - you all fashioned these memories yourselves."

"Wasn't there anything you could've done to change these events from happening?'

"Nah - I never faired too well in the shops. I fared better on the streets, in the papers. That bailiwick was my section."

He smiled at me and tipped his hat as he and everything around me fell out of focus...

To be continued...

It's How We Play The Game - Comic Book Rehab - issue #1 (2nd printing)

I haven't reviewed any issues of the DC relaunch because I was away from the shops last month. I thought, "No Problem!, I can stop by anytime and they'll have SOMETHING." Boy, I was wrong.

I was right, too - there were plenty of comics to buy - just none of the DC #1's. Why is that?

No, it's not because everybody bought them - when you hear that a comic book sold out, they're refering to comic shops buying all the copies that were printed. All the sales figures buzzed about online are just that. So what's really happening? The shops are hoarding.

The way to increase demand on a large supply is to ration it and make it seem scarce, then create a demand for reprint editions to be printed quickly and sold quickly. The 1st editions can be resold as back issues for 2 or 3 times the cover price, depending on popularity. The little guys (us, the shoppers, the fans, the man in the suit, or the kid or parent thinking of this stuff as investments) won't mind because it only helps lift the value of what they have bundled and sealed or slabbed in their closet or drawer or trunk or wherever.

The flaw in this reasoning is that the market for comics has dwindled into a subculture. You can be a fan of these characters and still never have read a comic book. If the demand declines for various reasons, then the issues you've been hoarding in the back of the shop deteiorate into sales slime, and that's how you end up with brand new, pristine 1st issues in quarter/half-dollar/dollar bins at shops and conventions, or online sellers posting lots of copies in one bundle for auction.

Another problem - the values are for trade - you can still go to a shop and the owner will still offer to buy your collection for a dime per book. The numbers you hear about are the comics value bartered for stacks of  comics, plus some cash (if any) that adds up to that much. So, yes, it is possible that that copy of Amazing Spider-Man #1 from 1998 that you bought for $20.00 cash is actually what it trades for. Well, if you see something you really like...

So...if you're hungry for those new #1's that came out - as a reader, wait for the reprint edition. If you're a collector, you could save up to buy the original 1st edition #1's instead. This gimmick ... every new #1 issue offered never seems as old and rare as the first from long before our time...

See, this is why we need Lara Croft. The next Tomb Raider film should be about finding some cache of old comics...never mind dusty old temples of made-up gold. Actually that could be the plot of National Treasure 3 - Harry Truman's secret stash.

Selective Six: "The Thrill of The Hunt!, By Jove!"

I've made allusions to hunting and "The World's Most Dangerous Game" in regard to Free Comic Book Day - which is this Saturday, May 5th - because that's exactly what it is. It's not promoted too well, some comic shop owners get to practice being sly, and the end result is a walkabout of every shop you can think of within sane distance.

Some shops will have ordered enough copies of free swag to appease both the regular customers, the newcomers, the swag seekers, and the stage mothers hoping this will be the only trip to the store they or their kids will ever make. Some have shopkeepers-turned soup nazis, handling out one random copy of any book to whomever has the right teeth or hair or whatever pleases. Other shops use the day to package unsold overstock and hand it out in random grab bags - others will carry on as though the day does not exist. The best shops have enough to let you pick one of everything.

Then there's the comics. There's not much in the way of a guide to what's being offered, so with no opportunity to browse, your judgement is based on the cover that catches your eye - there's the trap. You might be picking an unfinished preview or a free reprint of a book you already have or lightwieght new material. If the store has set a limit, you're sunk. Trust your instincts. Search the net before you walk in and walkabout.

Now, what can be more fun than to use a familiar example to explain the need for FCBD and the Comic Book Market in as vague a way as possible:

Picture a long wide countertop filled with tall glasses of milkshakes - all flavors. You've got a box of straws-sip one milkshake, discard the straw, then use a fresh straw to take another sip out of that same milkshake. You never move on to the other shakes and repeat the same actions with your straws until that one glass is half-full, or half-empty, from your p.o.v. You suddenly decide it's a good idea to try the other shakes on the counter - but you're out of fresh straws. So you try using a used straw to sip out of the other shakes. That isn't really a great idea, but it's all you've got and you repeat these steps - while going back to the increasingly shrinking first glass, because that's the only one that you had used all the straws on and it seems to work out, might as well finish it up.      

That's the last 15 years in a nutshell.

Take care everyone. have a milkshake. ;)

P.S. - Don't think I'm giving comic shops a poke in the ribs just because they're spending more on free stuff than they can hope to earn back - it's not their business to think that way - this day was created with high optimism, minimal negativity. Until the day when someone writes a book called "The Power Of Negative Thinking" then positive is the way to go.

Marvelous Two-in-One with Comic Book Rehab!

What's all this? What's all this? What's all this?

Well, if Twitter is the main feature, and the Facebook page is the DVD-Rom content that I can't access because I'm watching on an average player, then this blog is the Bonus section!

I started to notice things....

Feeling old but not quite grownup?

Notice how the crowd in the comic shop is gettin' older, but not neccessarily wiser?

Notice how the comic book  publishers are back to making waves about their price point? "We're STILL at $2.99!" In the late 70's/early 80's it was "Still 25 cents!"

yeah...

So I couldn't help but imagine Frederic Wertham still around, perhaps as a brain in a tank, looming large, and an audience that, like myself , may notice how the players in the field are becoming more popular, but the actual books are not socially acceptable.  Nobody wants to give up the ghost , yet could anyone have dreamed of still being into comics past their 20's?

With those thoughts established and out of the way, I'll be back soon...

Amazing Comic Book Rehab!

I'm Joseph Adorno. This is the commentary to my Comic Book Rehab Twitter page. If you have not seen my Twitter page yet, I reccomend you jump over to http://www.twitter.com/comicbookrehab and have a look. I'll be using this blog to explain myself often. If you're like me and jump to the commentary anyway, well, I'll be back with lots of posts shortly. Keep checking on me!